Miserable Kristen Stewart makes lots of friends

I just got another dispatch from a spy at the Coachella music fest, that two-weekend gathering where dozens of celebrities put on their most pointlessly spendy Dolce & Gabbana clothes, drive out to the desert, and watch the Wu Tang Clan perform in the middle of a dust storm.

Stars love it because they get to hang out in roped-off areas away from the hoi-polloi; get a wider choice in booze; enjoy a much better view of the shows; and shuttle from place to place via backroads limited to production drones and VIPs. From Clint Eastwood to Lindsay Lohan, from Danny DeVito to Katy Perry--they all show up.

“It’s like celebrity Disneyland,” my spy says. “Very celebrity friendly.”

Unless you’re Kristen Stewart. Apparently, all those advantages don’t amount to much when you’re her.

Per my spy, the Twilight actress was hanging out in the ultra-exclusive “artists area”--reserved mostly for performers and the other performers who like them--when a fellow VIP approached her. 

Stewart’s reaction? “Being all sulky and bothered.”

So how did the rest of the mandarins in the roped-off area respond? By deciding that they would all walk up and say hello.

“Everyone was going out of their way to be like HI KRISTEN! because she was trying so hard to be sulky and incognito,” my spy says. “If she just acted normally no one would give a shit.”

Well, to be fair, it is kinda tough to be incognito when you sparkle in the sun.

P.S.: DeVito, in contrast, may be the most beloved celebrity among Coachella workers. "He always stops for photos and remembers people who work there. He says things like, 'Hey, you drove me 2 years ago! How you doing? Still beautiful!'"